Ask Game part 2

The ask game continues! Here’s the next batch from over on tumblr.


Anonymous asked: jacob, have you ever had a negative interaction with any of the sprites that still haven’t warmed up to you? how did it go if you have?

“Nothing like a huge panic … but I have definitely startled some of ‘em once or twice. One sprite came whipping around a tree at one point and screamed when he saw me. I think the poor dude was pretty embarrassed about it, but it’s not like I’m gonna tell all the other sprites what happened. I’m a giant to them, I get why they’d be scared.”


Anonymous asked: For our big teddy bear Jacob: why is your necklace so special to you? Where’d you get it?

“Ah, this is … when I was a little kid, like five or something, my dad went home to Greece for a bit. I guess since I was upset I couldn’t go, he promised to bring something back for me. He probably bought it from some local artist that makes stuff like this for tourists and stuff, but I got super attached to it. Especially after he got sick. It keeps him close.”


Indigomasquerade97 asked: Okay, Jacob. We all know you have been exposing your exasperated winged friend to the chaos that is humanity. Have you ever exposed him to any video games? And if so, what are his (and your) favorite games to play?

“Ha, well, one of the first times I ever hung out with Bowman, he actually saw me fiddling around with my buddy’s DS. Bowman thought it was some kind of animal at first until I showed him how it worked.

“It took me a while to get him to actually try the thing himself, but I did borrow the game to bring it back just to see. I think he likes puzzle games better, since they don’t require timing and Bowman gets frustrated when he can’t reach the right buttons fast enough. He seems to have fun with the touch screen though. His wings get all twitchy.”


Anonymous asked: Hey hey, Bowman, we all know Jacob’s a really calm and gentle guy, but what do you and the other wood sprites think of him eating meat, and maybe hunting animals while in the woods with you and about humans being omnivores in general?

“Well. Just because I don’t eat meat, doesn’t mean something else can’t. There’s a lot of things in the forest that are way less … I dunno, respectful about it than Jacob is, I guess. He goes away from the village when he’s going to eat anything. I’m just glad humans don’t eat sprites.”


Anonymous asked: My best friend wanted to ask you, Bowman: have you ever had ice cream?

“Ice scream? I’ve yelled when my friends throw snow on my wings. That’s the worst feeling! But I always get them back for it.”


Anonymous asked: hey bowman, has jacob told you about human myths/fairy tales/etc?

“Yes. I can’t believe how close and yet far away you humans are from the truth. At least maybe it helps keep you out of sprite business!”


Anonymous asked: Buddy boy Bowman, how much do you know about Jacob’s family? Would you ever want to meet them?

“I know his mother is really nice, and his father died. It would have been interesting to meet his dad, since apparently Jacob tries all the time to be just like him. I’d have to give him some feedback. Or maybe I’d have to bop them both, depending.

“I might meet his mother and her new mate someday? But I’m not rushing into even more giants knowing about me or anything.”


Anonymous asked: Lord Cerul, hi! In the BoW book, when Bowman first reports of giants who he believed were carnivores, and the elder who was present told legends of humans eating and caging sprites, you were the first who was willing to give us a chance and thought we might be reasonable despite this. Why is that, sir?

“Ah. I suppose I have a few reasons. Wellwood has stood for a long time, and I’ve no doubt that the sprites have changed since it was first established. Why should the giants have stayed exactly the same? Also, as someone who’s read quite a bit of the Archives myself, I know that they are often written in the emotion of the moment, which could color the claims made against any giants. Sadly, it really only takes one bad human to cause us insurmountable trouble.

“Lastly, it was clear to me that Bowman had his own doubts about the legends, and he would be curious himself. I merely gave him some small protection from the backlash should he act on his curiosity.”

Excerpt: An Unexpected Customer

I thought I might have something else written so I could vary up my excerpts, but that didn’t end up happening. At least this little fic is proving to be a lot of fun!


Aziraphale smiled. “I like my books and the neighborhood. Oh, I always find myself back in London even when I travel far.”

Oscar nodded and shuffled his cloth-wrapped feet against the tabletop. “So you’ve been lots of places?”

“Oh, I should think so,” Aziraphale replied. “Israel, China once or twice, Edinburgh …” He trailed off as Oscar’s expression became blank for a moment. “All over,” he said instead.

Ask Game

Over on my tumblr, I did a small ask game in which people could send in questions directly to my characters and I would answer in the character’s voice. I decided to compile what I have so far into one post over here.


@therealbrigeedarocks Asked: Hey Oscar, we know you’re pretty good at sewing but are there any other hobbies you’d like to try?

“W-well, I really like it when people watch the, um, there’s cooking shows on TV sometimes, and someday, if I could, I would wanna try to cook something all by myself. Not, um, not the ones that … some of ‘em are kinda stressful ‘cause they’re trying to win a prize, and they’re not as fun to watch…”


Anonymous asked: For Bowman: do sprites know what airplanes are? Have they seen them fly over the forest?

“We never knew what the big white birds were until Jacob told me one time. We just knew sometimes they were loud and could pull the clouds around, and that is just ridiculous and it makes way more sense that it’s humans’ fault.

Jacob also told me the fairy lights that fly so high up in the middle of the night are ‘air planes’, too, but I don’t think that’s right.”


Anonymous asked: For my BOY Jacob: do you ever just lie to bowman about random stuff about human society just because you know he can’t prove you wrong. Like “hey, you know humans have cloud factories that make and produce clouds all the time, right?” And just watch as Bowman tries to rationalize what you said.

“Oh man, all I can think of is him finding out. I’m not great at lying but like, Bowman asks a lot of questions about everything and sometimes I don’t actually know the answer. So I’ve made some stuff up sometimes. Honestly I have no idea what he will be skeptical about and what he’ll just accept, y’know? Like he knows what airplanes are now but doesn’t believe me that the lights moving in the sky at night are also airplanes.”


Anonymous asked: For the ask game! Question for Bowman and Rischa: have you ever heard Jacob casually say something fatalistic, like “kill me now” or “this makes me wanna jump off a cliff”? Because this is so casual with humans, and if one of my friends says something like this, my typical answer is “same”.

Rischa: “Wh-what? That sounds awful! Why would someone say something like that?”

Bowman: “Don’t worry, Birdie, it’s like sarcasm. I think. Some kinda human thing. Pretty sure I’ve heard him say something like ‘I guess I’ll die’. But usually he saves his jokes to try to tease me and he thinks he’s so funny when he does.”


Anonymous asked: Yo, Lord Scar Sir, have you ever had to scold Jacob for just teenage shenanigans? What’s that like?

“Ha. That giant is better behaved than some of the sprites around here, if I’m honest. I don’t have to say much if he’s wandering too close to somewhere he shouldn’t.

Some in the village are wondering if he’ll lend some of that mildness to the Leafwing boy, but I’m not holding my breath.”


Anonymous asked: Hey, Bowman, since there are Wellwood sprites who are still a bit distrustful of your giant, have you ever got into an argument/fight with someone because they called Jacob a monster or something?

“Most of us aren’t fighters in Wellwood, but some of the parents with nestlings that always want to see Jacob … they’ve scolded me a lot. As if I’m somehow the reason their nestlings are so curious about the giant that visits the village sometimes. Usually I have to fly out of the village to get away from them when they’re on that nonsense. I can’t control a whole giant any more than I can control some people being afraid of him.”

Excerpt: An Unexpected Customer

The fluff continues to fluff! I’m having fun with these silly foodies.

Speaking of food, any opinions on what a certain principality might order at a cafe just down the street and around the bend for a light lunch? Send in your thoughts to my askbox or as a comment on this post! Especially if you’re British and/or own a bookshop.

~~~

“Just a small miracle,” Aziraphale said. “I go unnoticed all the time, when it suits me, of course.”

Oscar had to pause to think about whether he’d heard right. It wasn’t the first time Aziraphale had said it, but even with different context it didn’t make a lot of sense. “Just a small miracle” shouldn’t explain away the sudden appearance of a teacup, nor why Aziraphale could go unnoticed. Oscar began to wonder if he’d get a better explanation if he asked.

He decided not to risk it. “Oh. Th-that’s okay, then, I suppose. It’ll work on me, too?”

Anonymous Message

Anon asked: Are there still a few sprites in wellwood unwilling to trust Jacob or just generally kinda freaked out by him still?


There definitely are! He’s a giant, even among humans, and to the wood sprites that’s an intimidating prospect. Though most of them trust that he is a protector for the village, it can be hard to get past that size. To them, four inches tall is pretty big. Jacob is seventy seven inches tall.

He tries his best to be respectful and give the home trees some distance when he visits. The sprites that don’t come out of their homes to see what he’s up to are the ones he knows haven’t completely warmed up to him yet.

An Unexpected Customer

Chapter 2: Miracle Tea

Most visitors to A.Z. Fell’s bookshop in Soho would say they have some trouble in the store – they can’t find the owner or the book they would like, or the place doesn’t take cards. For a borrower taking up residence in the cozy shop, the problems that can arise are entirely different. Oscar isn’t prepared for his encounter with the very humanlike owner of the shop.

Then again, Aziraphale isn’t prepared for his encounter with this miniature visitor, either.


After a bumpy start, Aziraphale and Oscar manage to have a real conversation with some surprises for both of them.

Reader Message: Around the World

Prompt: What if Bowman got confused about the phrase “around the world”, and Jacob realised Bowman didn’t know that the Earth is round, not flat, and Jacob had to try and both to explain and convince his incredulous lil buddy.

This email got buried in my inbox a little bit, but thank you so much for sending it in! I had fun pondering how much the wood sprites of Wellwood would actually know about the round earth and solar system and such. My guess is there are a few that do actually know about how that works, to a degree, and could even recreate the calculations that Eratosthenes computed to find the circumference of the earth.

Bowman, however, is not a scholarly sprite. If there are sprites studying astronomy, he’s not among them.

Want to send in your own prompt? Contact me here!


“What does that mean?”

Jacob paused in his walking to glance to the side. Bowman perched on the end of a long, spindly branch, and even his tiny weight barely disturbed it. A focused curiosity fixed on Jacob. “Which part?”

Bowman held up a hand and waved it in a circular gesture. “You said ‘around the world’. What does that mean? Is it just another human thing?”

“Oh,” Jacob turned to address the sprite fully, knowing he had let slip another phrase that he took for granted. For someone four inches tall who had never left his single forest before, Bowman didn’t necessarily have a reason to know. “Well, the earth is round, Bowman, like a … berry, or–”

“Or the moon?” Bowman cut him off with an amused smirk. “I know what round means, giant.”

Jacob grinned. “Yeah. Like how the moon is round. But the earth is way bigger than the moon and it takes a long time for anyone to get all the way around it.”

Bowman contemplated that for a long pause. He’d perched right at Jacob’s eye level, so Jacob could see the journey of realization on Bowman’s face as he tried to reconcile with what he knew. Sunrise and sunset were important parts of a wood sprite’s day, and Jacob wondered how Bowman had viewed them before.

Verdant green wings twitched in annoyance. “Well I almost never pay attention to the sky charts or anything like that,” Bowman dismissed. “Not like I want to fly that far.”

Jacob nudged at the branch so that it swayed slightly. “I know that’s a lie, you’d fly all the way around it if you could.”

“Oh, I know I could,” Bowman boasted. His wings fluttered to life and he dove off the branch to glide ahead of Jacob. “But if it’s so hard for humans to do it, I wouldn’t want to leave you behind.”

“Thanks, dude,” Jacob called after him, resuming his walk.

Muunfel Lore Bits #5

Cira Dawn isn’t the first Oracle that has ever taken up residence in her temple, but she might be the most decorated. The power that grants her the position enables her to see not only the futures, but a lot of the past as well, with almost all of time accessible to her with some effort. It also gives her the ability to create and resolve paradoxes on a whim.

Cira also communes with beings not on the physical plane, especially the gods. Many of them find her amusing or endearing, and would protect her if the need arose. In return, sometimes they are allowed to ride along in her headspace to view the world from a slightly more mortal perspective.

An Unexpected Customer

Chapter 1: Rather a Bad Start

Most visitors to A.Z. Fell’s bookshop in Soho would say they have some trouble in the store – they can’t find the owner or the book they would like, or the place doesn’t take cards. For a borrower taking up residence in the cozy shop, the problems that can arise are entirely different. Oscar isn’t prepared for his encounter with the very humanlike owner of the shop.

Then again, Aziraphale isn’t prepared for his encounter with this miniature visitor, either.

Excerpt: An Unexpected Customer

I’m still working on it! Very soon I’m thinking I will split this story into parts because it just keeps growing, and I want to start posting things. For now, here’s another excerpt of my foray into Good Omens fanfiction.


Finding what to say was the next monumental task. Aziraphale’s hands twitched at his sides, and then he clasped them in front of the worn buttons of his waistcoat. He didn’t even think of sitting in the chair, as inviting as it was with its extra cushion leaned against the back and all. He couldn’t help thinking of his first assumption, that the little fellow was a mouse, there to chew on the books and make a mess of things.

Now he’d gotten a proper look at him, he didn’t seem like the type to chew on the books. He certainly didn’t look at all prepared to try to buy one either. In fact, the little fellow mostly seemed frightened, as if he wished to be anywhere in the world other than the bookshop.

Despite his usual protectiveness over his cherished volumes, that last bit did not sit well with Aziraphale at all.

“Dear fellow, it … it seems we’re off to rather a bad start.”